Imagine it with me, you just had the most beautiful time with Jesus in your quiet time. He sat with you, whispered his affection over you, and you received His help. You slowly close your journal and get up to move onto the day's simple demands. Dishes, laundry, teaching the children.. and so on. Things are moving along quite nicely until...
You hear a loud smash coming from the bedrooms. You freeze. This is not going to be good. Instead of slowing down and remembering everything that the Lord just told you in your quiet time, you run down to the bedrooms and see a window cracked and broken lying on the floor. Every good thing you heard is now forgotten as you look at your guilty son standing there.
"I was doing a handstand next to the wall and my foot hit the window..."
The only thing you remember how to do is freak out. Frustration, annoyance and disbelief rythe through your body and instead of being still and allowing it to pass, It comes out your mouth... "What were you even thinking? Don't you know that this kind of thing can happen? What is wrong with you? Why can't you slow down?"
At this point your words aren't even words right now, they're bullets and they're being shot right at your own kin.
You walk away, fully knowing you blew it, frustrated that you blew it, and now wondering what is next.
Well this story is a true story. A true event that happened in our home a short while ago. After the incident happened, all I could think to myself as I replayed the scenario in my head was..
"I am such a failure"
"Does my time with Jesus even matter?"
"I'll never get this right, I'll be broken forever"
Right here, my friend. Let's pause the story and play choose your own adventure. I want frame your perspective with this pivotal mindset:
Transformation comes at the growth edge of our lives. Growth always feels like failure.
If you’ve felt like a failure in your mothering, fathering or family culture, you are at a pivotal and very exciting point in your life. Why is it exciting? Because when you leave a beautiful quiet time with Jesus and you bump into a crisis, it is the mercy of God! He delights in growing and maturing you. Interestingly enough, He allows the enemy of our souls to try and test us in to conform us into His own image. The enemy never gets any credit for those who are in the Kingdom of God.
Every failure that we encounter is a doorway to growth. What would it look like if we don't land in and stay in our failures but allow them to gently touch us, form us and help propel us into something better?
Back when my son broke the window, I failed in my response to him. But now, I have a beautiful opportunity to restore connection and make it right. The fortune is in the follow up. By touching on the failure, acknowledging my weakness both to the Lord and to my son, I have a great opportunity for growth. I can ask myself some very important questions with the Holy Spirit...
1.) What was really going on when I discovered the window was broken?
2.) Why was I so frustrated? (It's important to take a no judgement view here by simply asking why without shame.)
3.) What lies am I believing about my son? What lies am I believing about myself?
4.) What is the Lord saying over my failure?
Take this questions with you the next time you encounter a seeming failure after a great quiet time. It is not the enemy attacking you as one might think, but rather an opportunity to become who God said that you are through trial by fire.
